Starting in Reno, Nevada

   Jan and I were married Feb.11, 1978 I remember waiting for the county office to open to get the license.  We were in a hotel room my parents were resting on one bed Jan and I both fully clothed were trying to rest on the other.  I think we were in a state of shock we kind of just stared at each other.  Some how that morning  we got every thing done and went to a casino for lunch.  This was the first time for me in a casino and I was plugging nickels into a slot machine when they called us to be seated.  Jan said Dave they called us and I just kept on stuffing nickels in the machine, My mother always one to speak her mind said David Michael, when she used the middle name It always got my attention because it meant that I was in trouble or was messing up. I turned and said What? with what amounted to total ignorance on my part. I guess being twenty has its disadvantages. She looked at Jan with that I'm sorry look and said Dave your not being very nice to Jan. And me in all my youthful sincerity and stupidity said with a honest and straight face I don't Have to be nice we're married now. My mom was stunned and was speechless which for her was rare.  I realized at this point by her look that I was totally how shall I say screwed.  I looked past my mom to my new bride and she seemed to add inches to her already six feet and I got what was beyond the teary eyed hurt feelings I expected to see. She didn't say a word she didn't need to.  What I got was far past the icy stare description. It went into an area only she dominated.  It was a look that could control a class of fifty two wana-be graduating seniors who were short English units in a night class.  It was a look that I would learn well over thirty three years and could put me in check quicker then any verbal assault. The kids called it the eye brow. She could tilt just one in such a fashion that you had to stop whatever you were doing and pay attention. I saw here one time control a line of thirty or so rowdy IBM employees at the pizza parlor where she managed with just that look she took charge of numerous situations. Truly an awesome weapon in an era where people swear and bluster and make fools of themselves all she had to do is give them the look..  
 

Giving

I come from a family of bean counters I did this for you now you owe me.  Jan showed me that true giving comes from the heart and the joy we receive as we help others in a private way surpasses any public recognition or award.  Looking back on our life I can think of many times she used to say to me " David do it with a happy heart."  Well I finally learned the lesson and God started to bless my life as he did hers.  Her lesson to the family and to friends would be give from the heart no strings attached and watch all the flowers in your life bloom.